For families who have not adopted a child, it's hard to imagine almost forgetting about the fact that your child is adopted.
But for the many families whose adopted child has blended in naturally, the adoption process fades into the background as daily life takes over, and it becomes a non-issue.
I remember 21 years ago when we adopted my younger son Jimmy, how families we knew would congratulate us and say, "Our kids (or our older son, etc.) are adopted too!"
We had no idea these kids we knew were adopted, as it simply never came up in chatting together.
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While we sometimes see horrendous adoption stories stories in the media, we know that sensationalism and drama are of human interest and make for great movies, books, and interviews.
However, in my extensive network of adoptive families and adoption resources, I don't know of a single family who wishes they had not adopted. On the contrary, every one, without exception, says adoption was one of the best decisions they ever made.
One time in conversation with a few friends the topic of adoption came up. A woman who didn't know I was an adoptive mom was curious and said, "I can't imagine what it would be like to pick a total stranger of a child out of the world and to automatically love him as my own!"
Yet that's exactly what happens! How often have I heard comments like, "God really led us to this child …" or "We prayed for the child we were meant to raise, and we are sure our son/daughter is an answer to that prayer."
There are so many new initiatives to encourage adoption and dispel myths.
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The National Council on Adoption has found that 51% of adoptive families say that expense was at least partly a barrier to adoption. However, now there are numerous fundraising and contribution efforts to offset the expensive steps to adopt, something that didn't exist when our family sought an adopted child. Today potential adoptive parents can obtain tax credits, an adoption subsidy, and in some cases employee assistance, Separately there's assistance for military personnel, federal, or state grants, and private foundation grants.
Various church and pro-life organizations assist with some adoption expenses as well, such as covering a home study, legal fees, etc. There are numerous Christian and Catholic programs to assist families seeking to adopt. They include Christian Adoptions, Nightlight Grant Programs, A Child Waits Foundation, Adopt a Love Story, Heart of Adoption, and the online fundraising platform, AdoptTogether.
Springs of Love, a Catholic adoption ministry, offers an informative, self-paced online "Be Not Afraid" discernment "retreat," dozens of online adoption story testimonials, and has launched local chapters for families to assist and network in support of foster care and adoption.
Meanwhile, pregnancy centers play a crucial role in continuing to inspire abortion-minded mothers to consider the beautiful alternative of adoption, and offer material aid to new adoptive families, part of an estimated $452 million in aid pregnancy centers give out each year.
Seeing how my older, biological son and my younger, adoptive son have grown together and how close they've become has been the number one joy of my life. Adopting Jimmy was the best decision I ever made!
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Yes, adopting a child is a leap of faith. Just like having any child. I think God planned it that way.
