Laying on the cold floor, my cheeks wet with tears, my world seemed to be falling apart.
I felt like I was drowning and couldn’t catch my breath. I was gasping for air in between the sobs and the room began spinning. The next thing I knew I was on the floor with two nurses hovering over me. One was fanning me as the other was trying to give me water.
My heart was broken. I was pregnant.
Growing up in a Christian home and going to a private school my whole life, I knew with all my heart abortion was wrong. I even marched outside abortion clinics as a child with my family, praying for life. But I let fear consume my thoughts and believed the lie that abortion was the only way.
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Lying on that abortion room floor, I couldn’t see what tomorrow looked like—much less nine months. I didn’t see how it was possible to move forward with a pregnancy just to shame my family and disappoint everyone that I loved.
As the nurses helped me up, the tears still would not stop. I talk with women today who have had abortions and they always remind me that this part of my story is not normal: I actually did have a nurse who cared.
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The nurse told me in that moment, “You are not getting an abortion today. You can come back another day but today is not your day.” So I walked out, taking a deep breath, and went to a waiting area where the father of my child was waiting. With my eyes red and my face swollen, I looked at him and said, “We’re still pregnant.”
In that moment, we decided to choose life. We decided to look fear in the face and confront this challenge in front of us. We decided to be brave and tell our family and loved ones what happened and that our lives would never be the same.
Little did we know looking forward, this challenge would end up being the biggest blessing that we could have ever receive. We had no idea how God would use this miracle to unify our families and build a legacy that would change generations.
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At 16 weeks pregnant, I said, “I do.” I promised a lifetime of love to not only my husband, but to this child who had changed my life.
Now, 16 years later, we are blessed with four children that we love so much and a love between my husband and I that will last a lifetime. We look back on that time quite often when we almost lost our son because of fear of our future. We almost lost everything.
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Even now, with the hustle and bustle of a big and busy family, in between basketball practices and swim team, when I’m cooking dinner in the kitchen and the kids are playing games in the living room, my husband will walk up behind me and put his arms around me and whisper in my ear, “Thank you for being the strong one. Thank you for choosing life even in my weakest moment. Thank you for choosing us.”
And I look up to God and thank Him for the blessings he has given us.
Amy Ford is President and Co-Founder of Embrace Grace, a non-profit organization formed for the purpose of providing emotional, practical and spiritual support for single, young women who find themselves in an unintended pregnancy.
